Rules For Living With The Avengers & Friends
by Just Four Misfits
Summary: Living with the Avengers can be hazardous for your health. Here are a set of rules to be more careful around them and their friends. From the p.o.v of an oc.


**A/N: So these may have been done before. But you know, I like to make my own and I haven't seen anything for atleast a year, so that deserves a new set of rules. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers, or some of these rules. They have been circling Tumblr, and the likes. But I DO own my oc whose point of view this is in.**

**Sasha Burke - will indeed be getting her own series soon. When I finish school this year you may see her more often **

Rule # 1: For the love of god. Stop yelling 'It's Hammer Time,' whenever Thor goes to use Mjolnir.

{ **So this one is all Clint and Tony. **}

{ **Every….Single….Time. **}

Rule # 2: You are not allowed under any circumstances to 'free fall' from the top of Stark Tower.

{ **I don't care if you can 'fly' SAM & CLINT. **}

{ **You keep giving our medic a heart attack whenever you pass her floor. **}

Rule # 3: Loki….please…stop putting Steve in the big freezer down stairs when he sleeps.

{ **One: He wakes up freezing. **}

{ **Two: He starts to panic. And no one wants that. **}

{ **and finally it's just mean. **}

Rule # 4: Stop forgetting Clint.

{ **So … this may have been **_**all **_**of us. **}

{ **We went out for dinner… and we didn't get home until late. And we see Clint sitting on the rafters glaring at us. **}

{ **Oops. **}

Rule # 5: No quoting 'Bob's Burgers'

*"Tony you're on the grill

My crotch is itchy

*"No one sheds like this family, it's like a bunch of Chewbaccas

{ **Thor...he has a **_**lot **_**of hair. **}

*"I hope they're using protection because I am _not _taking care of that baby.

{ **Clint and Natasha had a fun night. **}

{ **Although….we could hear them…** }

{ **Tony wants tighter walls **}

*"Frowny face? All I've been is super nice to you and this is the thanks I get? I loved you, I loved you like a horse, which is my favourite animal. You know what, let's just stop before we both say something we'll regret, like that horses are better than cows. I regret that, but it's true.

{ **I …. Loki doesn't want to come by anymore. **}

*"So you're not going to get revenge today?

Tony: No Sasha, I'm not

Okay got it. Then I won't bring your credit card….which I cut into a ninja star!

Oh, you cut my credit card?

INTO A NINJA STAR!

*"Hey I'm sorry. It's pre-show nerves. Come Here. Hug for luck.

*Clint goes in for the hug.

YOU FREAKIN' IDIOT! YOU DON'T HUG FOR LUCK IN THE ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS.

{ **So Bruce was feeling a little jumpy… **}

{ **and I decided to calm him down with a hug…. **}

Rule # 6: "Do you want to see something strange and mystical?"

{ **"NOOOOO! GET OUTTA HERE WITH THAT WATCH! LAY OFF THE POOR BEAVERS, WILL YA? **_**SHEEEEESH! **_**YOU'RE A CREEP! GO AWAY! WE WERE HAVING A GOOD TIME UNTIL **_**YOU **_**SHOWED UP, JEEPERS! **_**UGGGGGHHHHH **_**GO HAVE SOME COFFEE, WITH CREAM, OR SOMETHING! BECAUSE I'LL TELL **_**YOU **_**SOMETHING: **_**THIS IS A HAPPY PLACE! **_}

{ **The whole hellicarrer was dead silent after that. **}

{ **Director Fury gave me a stern talking too. **}

Rule # 7: "I don't want to be a man. I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead."

{ **Clint. **}

{ **I nearly died laughing when he said that to Maria and Natasha. **}

{ **Tony's face was priceless! **}

Rule # 8: Stop taking Steve's shield and yelling "I AM CAPTAIN AMERICA AND I WILL HIT YOU WITH MY FRISBEE!"

{ **He doesn't really appreciate it. **}

{ **Plus he really hates it when people touch his things. **}

Rule # 9: This is to go with rule 8.  
No using Steve's Shield as a Frisbee. A Plate. OR ANYTHING that it's not meant to be.

{ **Have you seen the wrath of a 90 year old man? **}

{ **It's not pretty. **}

Rule # 10: For God's sake, WE DO NOT LIVE IN A YELLO SUBMARIEN, stop singing that damn song!

{ **Someone introduced Thor to the The Beatles. **}

{ **It's the only thing he's been listening too. **}

{ **and rest of the team. **}

a/n: **well here it is. I hope it's okay. And if I have taken someones rules PLEASE let me know { in a nice way } and I'll be sure to ask them if I can use the rest **


End file.
